Ethan is 8

That title basically sums up the last month of my life. Well, that and a wedding/trip to Arizona somewhere in the middle there, but mostly it's been about the boy child. I started out writing this post on February 25th, the day he actually turned 8, but then life got all kinds of busy crazy, as it tends to do.

8 facts about Ethan:

1. Ethan has a birthday twin. I called Rachel on the morning of February 25th, 2003, to give her my baby news. She said something to the effect of: "Dude, I'm in labor!" And later that evening, Emma was born. Ethan was one week overcooked and Emma was two weeks ahead of schedule, so they apparently had an agenda! Here they are at 6 months:



2. When he was about 15 months old, I tried to give him a haircut. It did not turn out very well and so Ben got out the trimmers to fix it. As Ben was trimming the back of his head, the attachment fell off, and it made a huge bald spot. I stood there and bawled as I watched Ben shave the rest of my baby's golden locks off to match the gaping baldness. We left to AZ for a funeral right after, and I spent lots of time giving the evil eye to people who stared in public. I cried inside when relatives at the funeral said, "What a beautiful little girl!"about Mila. And then, "Oh, and...you have a boy!" Unfortunately, the hair really makes the baby in some cases, as we learned the hard way. Basically, he went from:

this...

...to this. Poor kid.

3. Right after he turned two, he really wanted a duck.

Incidentally, whenever he used to get mad at me as a 3 year old, which was a lot, he'd say, with all the rage he could muster, "Mom, if you don't stop saying that, I'm going to turn you into a DUCK!!"

4. When he was 3, Ethan developed a weird, bumpy rash all over his leg. We found out it was called Lichen Striatus. It doesn't hurt you in any way, it just kind of shows up and looks really creepy for a few months, then disappears. The doctors that diagnosed it were totally pumped because they had never seen it in real life, and they got to get out their special picture books and show me really gross pictures. But now, I wish I had taken a picture of Ethan's, because he would have loved to show his friends today.

5. Ethan never went through a train or superhero phase. He saw Cars when he was 3, and so Lightning McQueen reigned supreme for a few years, mixed in with some Scooby-Doo, until he discovered a little thing called Star Wars. Then it was all Jedi, all the time. Today, he still loves Star Wars, but he is also into Indiana Jones and Harry Potter.

6. Ethan was the nicest baby on the planet. He smiled at everyone and went to everyone. Just super pleasant and happy all around. Today, he is social and outgoing and loves to make his friends laugh. His church and school teachers tell me that he is a natural leader and the other boys in the class watch him to see how he will react in different situations (I don't know where he gets it from! No, seriously, I really don't.) He's not always happy. If he's upset with me, I know it. He has a crusty pout to rival all others. He also seems to enjoy butting heads with his older sister, because they certainly manage to do it a lot. But he also prays for Heavenly Father to listen to the prayers of homeless people, which melts my heart.

7. These days, his favorite things are frozen yogurt tubes, pizza, Top Ramen, Chinese food, playing board games as a family, Lego XBox games, his Nintendo DS, his cousins, his stuffed animals, play dates with friends, recess, Sponge Bob Square Pants, Cub Scouts, chasing the twins, going to the park, reading Harry Potter, and pretending to be embarrassed when he's snuggling with mom. His least favorite things are homework, bullies, his church pants, any pants (they never fit right!), Mila bossing him around, not being able to run around outside with friends, most of school, and being teased about liking Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez (to my knowledge, he doesn't like either, so I don't know why it's so funny to tease him about them. It just is.)

8. I love him a lot. He stole my heart when he was born and has yet to give it back.










Next up, the 8th birthday party...

Ugly is a Funny Word

Last night, on the way from Penn Station to the subway platform at 34th St., a less-than-fully-sane looking woman stepped into our path:

Woman: Won't you wish me a Happy Valentine's Day?

Ben: No, thank you.

Woman: You are very ugly, and you don't get no candy!

Ben: (after we got on the train) That was hurtful.

On the ride home, we replayed the scenario with different outcomes. What if Ben had turned around at that point and said, "Well, in that case, Happy Valentine's Day! Are you telling me you actually have candy to give me?" I guess we will never know.

The moral of the story is, when traveling by subway, bring your thick skin and a can of crazy repellent.

(I must add, this reminds me of an experience that is forever etched in my memory. I was about 6 and my sister was 3 and we were in the bank, waiting for my mom. We were swinging on the bars near the front door, and a plus-sized African-American woman walked by. Brinna stage whispered to me, "Hailey! That is the fattest woman I ever saw!" Before I could even blink, the woman turned around, stuck her finger in my terrified sister's face and yelled, "Oh yeah? Well, you the UGLIEST girl I EVER saw!" And then she walked away. To this day, any time I do my impression of that woman, it makes me happy to no end.)

Lisa's Special Day

Photos taken by the lovely Justin Hackworth

This post is dedicated to my favorite Valentine, Lisa (I can say that without sounding creepy because her actual maiden name is Valentine.) For Valentine's Day, she has, not one, but two awesome blog posts about the day of hearts. I feel honored to be mentioned in one of them, and in reference to chocolate, to boot! Oh happy day!

And while we're on the subject of Lisa, I think you should know that she is the MOST brilliant comedienne I have ever seen. I have cried tears from laughing so hard at her onstage antics. She could give Amy, Kristen, and Tina a run for their money, yet she chooses to be the go-to woman for her five amazing kids, and for that, she deserves a major shout-out. After all, V also stands for "validation" (am I right?)

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone! Ben and I are off to a Spurs/Nets game tonight in NJ, and so, as Gloria says on Modern Family, "I ween! I ween!"

iPhone Photo Dump

If your name is Rachel, and you have begged for more pictures, this post is for you. If your name is "I-hate-posts-with-only-pictures," then that's too bad because 2011 is all about being Hailey, and I like pictures. A LOT. Happy Valentine's Day!

The view from Ben's office.

Our bedroom.

This is a rare sight, indeed.

So is this. Cutie babysitter.

The Sunday before Christmas.

Ethan's loot. Both Santa and the Owl Post came! There were even owl feathers around the room...


Property of Mila.


For the twins!


Our little tree. My drama kids asked me if it was a "joke Christmas tree."

Central Park after one of the blizzards.

Our street after one of the blizzards.

Lane, in ballet class. I just love watching them try to make the positions. Cutie!

Lucy and Lane and I went to the Manhattan Childrens' Museum. We should have just gone straight to the sand area. They could have stayed here all day.

Lane

This place is up on 112th, on the way to pre-school. If you instantly recognize it, then you were probably born before 1980.

Dressing up on the snow day, with the exception of Ethan, who frequently dresses down.

Later, for the snow day, we headed to a neighbor's "backyard" to build snow forts.

Lane

Lucy

The snowball fight was pretty awesome.

There are a TON of little girls in our ward. The twins' social calendar is booked! This is Lane at Ella's fairy birthday party.

Lucy and Ella dancing.


The day after the snow day, Mila and I were walking down Broadway. We saw about five of these guys!

Ethan had to write a nonfiction book about a subject he was an expert in. He chose to write about life with twin sisters. This was at his publishing party.

Elephant trunks!

I had to go get Ethan's cub scout stuff...in the EMPIRE STATE BUILDING!

At a Valentine cookie decorating party.

Lane takes cookie decorating very seriously.

I thought you might want to know what my "happy place" looks like out here.

An invitation to Ethan's Harry Potter birthday party.

The inside...

For Activity Days, the girls made pink Rice Krispie treat hearts decorated with white chocolate and candy (this one is wrapped in red cellophane.)

Ben, eating the giant heart.

These last three pictures were taken with the Retro Camera app.

They pretend to like each other to humor me.

Lane

Love Mix

Today, I have a guest post over at Today's Mama. My very classy, clever friend Carina, otherwise known as Azucar, asked me to contribute, and since I like her AND I like music, I obliged. Now, I am the first to admit, I don't have the refined taste in music that some of my other friends have, and I don't claim to be a mix expert. As previously stated, I leave that to the experts. But, I do have lots of love songs that make me giddy, and so I went from there.

After looking at my list last night, Ben said, "Maybe your theme should have been, 'Songs that remind me of the person I love,'" and I told him that, while it was a great idea, it would have to wait until next time. But, in case you were wondering, that mix would include Matthew Sweet's "Almost Forgot" and Faith No More's "I'm Easy." And I did include one song just for Ben, because let's be honest, who else in the world listens to Anne Murray but Ben and I? Anyone?

Being yourself=being awesome

So, I'm currently reading this book called The Happiness Project, by Gretchen Rubin. It's written by this NYC resident who decided to spend a whole year working on different elements of her life, month by month, to create more overall happiness. It's really sort of an ironic read for me at this exact juncture in my life, but that's another topic for another day.

I bought the book from my ibooks app on my new iphone and I love it because now I can read on the subway instead of doing what I usually do, which is try not to stare at people who are trying not to stare at me. It's a fun game, but one I tire of quickly. So now I can stare at my iphone and pretend like the rest of the world doesn't exist, and this makes me a true New Yorker.

But, back to the book. I must say, I'm enjoying it and find myself thinking about it a lot. One thing I really like that she writes about is how she came up with twelve commandments for herself. The first one is "Be Gretchen," meaning it's important to be true to yourself and what makes YOU happy as much as possible. You need to come to grips with what you think is fun and interesting, and not feel like you should love something just because everyone else seems to.

I have probably mentioned this before, but I feel like I spent a great deal of my 20's worrying about what were the best ways to be a mom, dress, act, and play based on what I thought others were doing. For example, everyone was obsessed with scrap-booking, so I went and bought some scrap-booking supplies because that's what good moms did. I never wanted to touch those supplies and so I wondered what was wrong with me.

Around the time I hit 30, I had some real AHA! moments. I realized that I have no desire to scrapbook, and that's OK. I don't have to scrapbook to be a good mom, I don't have to like Coach purses to be stylish, and I don't have to watch SNL and Judd Apatow films to be funny. Once I had these revelations, I realized that it gave me more freedom to try different things that I might not have tried before, once I got rid of the pressure all around me to be good at them. Like running. I'm just not going to run a marathon. I know that. And so when all the ladies in my ward are discussing their training programs, I can smile and not feel uncomfortable because I know I can run 3 miles, and that's pretty awesome for me. "Being Hailey" gives me the freedom to be obsessed with Sci-Fi and post-apocalyptic scenarios, be sort of a food snob, watch a lot of TV, and get my biggest rush from the laughter of an audience. Being myself means I wear my Target threads with pride and never worry about stepping outside donning a cloche hat. It means I might not have anything to say when people start debating politics, but I will be the first to jump into an intense conversation about Gale vs. Peeta, or who should be cast as Katniss.

I've always told my kids, "Everyone has different talents," and I truly believe that there's a reason for that. Even though I don't sew, Rachel does, and so she makes me skirts and pillows. Even though I hate organizing projects, Lisa doesn't, and so she writes me amazing lists. Kacy knows the best books to read and how to make awesome play-lists. I'm not always sure what I contribute to others, but I think I'm fun to drink a Diet Coke and watch SYTYCD with, and maybe that is sort of a talent, right? I guess I've just learned the value in pursuing your own interests and passions, and letting others pursue theirs. And we are all that much more enriched for it.

Now, go and watch Downton Abbey on Masterpiece Theater (if that's your thing) so we can talk about how awesome Maggie Smith is as the Dowager Countess, a lady who is the very definition of being comfortable in your own skin, even if that skin is extremely judgmental and outspoken.

The LIST

New York has some awesome food, but it doesn't have a corner on the food market. For example, I haven't found a burger place that stands a chance against Smashburger nor a pad thai or massaman that I like better than Bangkok Grill, but I'm starting to wonder if I am only obsessed with the latter because it has been such an integral part of my life for the last three years. However, I have promised friends that I would keep track of my favorite dishes and places for their visits, and so, in no particular order, the LIST so far:

P.J. Clarke's: Ben took me to this place when we were here to apartment hunt this past summer. I geeked out over it because Don and Sterling went there for a drink once! It is very old school New York, and sitting in it, I can easily imagine a smoke-filled room of fedoras and pill box hats. We ordered the baked macaroni and cheese with bacon and I have never regretted it! (Sidenote: the owner of P.J. Clarke's died in the restaurant. He had his whole family there, and he was screaming at a waiter, and he just keeled over, dead. Moral of the story: be nice to waiters.)



Island Burgers and Shakes: Now, I said that I have not found a burger place to rival SB and that is because there are not many fast and fresh burgers here, a la SB and Inn-N-Out. They do have 5 Guys, which is alright, but not my favorite. They also have Shake Shack, and I have to say, I was underwhelmed. Now I love a medium rare patty, but my Shake Shack burger was bloody raw. And the shake is just your regular Inn-N-Out style straw shake. So yeah. Whatever. Anyway, there are lots of restaurant burgers that are good. We took my friend, Daryn, to Island Burgers before he went to see a show. It is in Hell's Kitchen and also across the street from Ben's building. I don't even remember which burger I ordered, but I really liked it and it was so big I had to eat it with a fork. I would go here again for sure, especially since I need to try a shake next time! 5 Napkin Burger is also quite good. Ben got a burger and I got mac and cheese, and both were excellent.

La Nougatine at Jean Georges: This restaurant is fancy-schmancy. We took Ben's mom here for her birthday. It is located in the Trump Tower on Columbus Circle and has a dress code. However, it also has a prix fixe dinner menu. In fact, Jean Georges was one of the first chefs to introduce a prix fixe menu when the economy got bad. I think it's a brilliant move because non-rich folks like us can eat at a glorious French restaurant. (Sidenote: Jean Georges is also the inventor of the molten chocolate cake. It was the result of a baking accident and now everyone makes it! I had his for dessert and it was divine!) Just order the fixed price menu. It will all be amazing. Ben's mom also ordered some butternut squash soup that made me cry.

Lombardi's: This pizzeria is in Little Italy and is apparently the first pizzeria in America. Cool, right? We went here with Ben's mom when she was in town. We did have at least a 30 minute wait, but it was a Saturday. It was pretty awesome. Since eating there, I have been to some other famous pizza places that beat this one out (see: Keste) but still good pizza.



Alice's Tea Cup: My mom was in town and we wanted to go to lunch for the twins' birthday, so we decided to try this cute little tea and scones cafe. My sister-in-law Kristen had told me about it and I had seen online that they had brunch. The girls love breakfast more than anything so I thought it would be perfect. Unfortunately, I missed the part that said brunch is only served on the weekends and we showed up on Monday. I was underwhelmed with the kids' menu selections, but I ordered the BLT on black bread for myself and wow, I love that thing. It had a blue cheese spread on it that was amazing, and my mom tried to eat all of mine. The restaurant was adorable and I would like to go back and try one of the various herbal teas and scones, along with my sandwich, of course.

Gennaro: This cozy little Italian place is right across the street from our apartment and Ben had read really good things about it, so we popped over there one night. The only thing I can really remember is this: the warm potato tartine with portobello and goat cheese. Oh.My.Word. I am so in love with this thing. Comfort food extraordinaire. Please go and try it. And take me with you.

Keste: Ben had a slow week at work. Ben decided to go on a quest for the best pizza in New York. He did all his research and went to different places for lunch, and all without me. He said he wanted to try them all out before bringing me. How thoughtful of him. Anyway, he made good on his promise, and brought me to Keste two days after Christmas. They are a true Neapolitan pizza joint, with real volcanic rock from Italy in their brick oven. I ordered the pizza special because the waiter told me it would change my life, in the most awesome Italian accent, I might add. It sort of did. It had more blobs of mozzarella on it than I thought was possible. Ben and I each ordered a whole pizza. The couple next to us said, "How are you guys going to eat all that?" We didn't leave a crumb. Then the same couple said, "You guys are awesome!" and left. Taken out of context, that comment is really strange. I like to think that the couple on the other side of us (who were from LA and on a pizza tour, wouldn't you know it) heard that statement and wondered why we were so awesome, since they had arrived there after the initial reaction to us ordering two pizzas. Either way, I felt awesome.


Crumbs Bake Shop: Many cupcakes I've had here have made me want to cry from disappointment. I have had too many dry Magnolia cupcakes to count. However, I discovered a cupcake at Crumbs that is essentially a giant Hostess cupcake. It is chocolate with white butter cream filling and chocolate ganache frosting on top. So far, it has always been moist and amazing. I am hopelessly in love.



More to come...

The Darndest Things

Everyone thinks that their kids are awesome. And they should. Because they ARE awesome. Lots of people in New York have dogs for children and they push them around in strollers (Iamsonotkidding) and talk to them like they're talking to a two year old child and I look away and pretend like I didn't notice because they should be totally embarrassed about that, right? Besides, my kids do the following things that I am almost positive a dog can't do.

One afternoon this past week, Lucy and Lane and I were headed out to pick up the older kids from school. Lucy bolted out of the elevator and across the lobby and left one shoe halfway across the room. She doubled back and met Lane at her shoe and this was their exchange:

Lucy: I just turned into Cinderella.

Lane: (kneeling down and putting the shoe on her sister's foot) I am not a prince now, Lucy. I'm just a girl.


Last week after church, the Primary President came over to me and said, "I don't know what you said to Ethan, but thank you!" I just stared at her blankly and she told me that, according to his teachers, he raised his hand at the beginning of their lesson and said, "I have an announcement to make." He then stood in front of the class and said, "I think we should all be more respectful of our teachers by listening to their lesson." And then he sat down. Amazingly enough, the kids were less disruptive and more reverent.


Finally, Mila brought me the first part of her essay to read, entitled "Don't Judge a Book by its Cover." Here is an excerpt:

"For example, if you see a new kid and she is fat, you do not just say 'She is fat. She must eat, like, McDonald's every night. She is gross and I won't be her friend.' You will eventually tell her she is fat and gross. She probably won't like it and won't react with a big hug and a box of chocolates. . . there may be another side to the whole story. Maybe the girl is just wearing a big puffy coat and she is really exercising and eating brussels sprouts."

So, this is weird...

Sunday afternoon, we all piled on to the 1 train as usual, on our way to church. We take up almost an entire center section of a subway car, so it's always nice to get on and find that empty row waiting for us. Such was the case this day, and we all sat there in our Sunday garb.

I looked over at the three men across from me and to my left. They were speaking French and they were large guys, yet they had all squeezed into what looked like two seats. I know from experience that those French types have no issues with not having any personal space on the Metro, so I figured they were quite comfy.

Next to them, directly across from me, was this Asian guy in his 20's. He was just listening to his iPod at first and then, he did something that caught my attention. He looked over at our family, took off his earphones, then pulled out a pen and what looked like a journal. He opened it and I saw short entries scribbled inside. He turned to a fresh page and started writing. I could barely just make out this sentence at the top: "A family of six got on the subway..." and that's all I could see before he looked up at me and I looked away hastily.

He kept writing and writing, and in between writing, he kept looking at me (I have great peripheral vision), then he would look at Ben, then each of the kids in turn. I was dying to see what he was writing about us, and I sort of wanted to yell, "What the heck are you writing about us in your diary?" But I didn't, and we got to 66th St., our stop, and he had written a full page, and we got up and got off. And I will never ever know. And it kills me.

I wonder if he will write a blog about us. Or make a TV show. Or an immersion art piece. Or a book, or comic book! Maybe it will be called, "The day I saw some people on the subway who were so obviously Mormon that I had to write it down," or, as I prefer to think, "The day I saw the most ridiculously good-looking, stylish mom with unfortunate roots that I have ever seen."

Come on, a page?! Maybe we just inspired him to get out of his dead end job, get married, and make babies. And I'm ok with that, too. But so help me, I want some credit.