Holiday Recap

I know that the holidays are over, believe me, especially as I'm freezing my tail off in this never-ending January (almost February) weather. However, I'd like to bask in the warmth of the holidays long past for just a moment.

We kicked off December with a raging party for the twins on the 2nd.

The girls, when presented with their cakes, reacted in opposite ways.

Laney demolished the thing in twenty seconds, shoving fistfuls of chocolate in her mouth...

...while Lucy, the Felix to Lane's Oscar, sat there and stared in disgust at the pink frosting that had somehow attached itself to her finger.

Opening presents

My mom and Aydan arrived at the tail-end of the party, and stayed with us for a week.

We went with Grandpa and Grandma Cannon and Aunt Margy and Uncle Eldon to see the lights at Temple Square.

Ethan, Aydan and Mila riding TRAX

Lucy and Lane, looking cozy, with the other kids at Temple Square

Mom, Lucy, Grandma, Lane and Aydan waiting for the train

Mom LOVES those babies!

We made a stop at Build-a-Bear to pick up a Rudolph and Clarice with Travis and Rachel and Co. (It was mainly the moms who wanted the reindeer, let's be honest)

Mila, waiting to get her Clarice stuffed. Look at festive Rachel in the background...

Mila, Andrew, Ethan and Emma with the finished products!

We got to see Mila's Christmas play. She played Friendly the Elf and Rachel made her a killer elf ensemble.

Why yes, those are bells around the edge of her skirt! She jingled all over the stage!

After Ben got done with Finals, we headed to Scottsdale, Arizona, where we spent Christmas in condos with Ben's entire family. It was wild and crazy and some people were throwing up and others were playing Guitar Hero III all night long--basically our typical family gathering. Here are some highlights:

That would be SEVEN one year olds. Count them if you don't believe me! We were all pregnant together. The couch really clashes with them and it bugs me, but whatev

All the grandkids, looking content on this peaceful Christmas Eve

The boys--can you guess which one is the dad? Barely!

The ladies--no one pregnant in this picture! (At least, I think so...)

Mila and her American Girl doll--don't you think they look alike?

Melanie and I took nine kids to the train park by ourselves--what were we thinking?

Lane, enjoying the park

Lucy, with a sticker on her face


Ladies' day out was spent getting massages, pedicures, and a fantastic lunch at the Cheesecake Factory!

I look tired in this picture. Maybe because I was. Sleeping in the same room with five people who wake you up all night does not a good night's sleep make. Especially after you've stayed up half the night talking about hemorrhoids--I love this family.

I have more pictures of our trip but I feel like I have posted a million already, and I really need to take a shower...

Funny Famous Friends

My friends Jake, Matt, and Garrett made this short film for the 24-hour short film competition in last week's LDS Film Festival. They won "Audience Choice" and "First Place"!



Matt was in another short film in the festival called "Blind Faith" with my friend Brett. Finally, my friend Erin starred in TWO feature films that premiered at the festival, "Errand of Angels" about sister missionaries, and "Tears of a King" about Elvis' religious side. She was Priscilla! I am seriously star-struck by all of them!

Flu, you are not my friend

And so I'm asking you to leave. I'm not even going to ask nicely any more. I've said "Please," I've made subtle hints like, "Wow, you've been here a week--I bet you're getting sick of us!" But you just keep on hanging out in the twins' room, messing up the carpets, making me do loads and loads of extra laundry, and eating me out of applesauce and bananas. I never get to go anywhere because I have to entertain you all day and all night long. I can't have friends over because you're such a clinger and it's just embarrassing. I consider myself to be a pretty patient hostess, but I loathe you. So far, you've managed to keep your distance from me and I appreciate that, but if you so much as brush my cheek, I will lose it. GET OUT OF MY HOUSE AND FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO ANNOY!

And on the way out, try to convince your dude bro, Winter, to leave with you. I know it's futile, because I know from past experience that he's going to stick around for at least three more months. It's hard to believe that we were so looking forward to his visit back in November. He was still the life of the party in December and everyone commented on his good looks all the time, and he's still charming on occasion, but most days, just really hung-over. I still love him, and I'm sure I'll be happy to see him next year. But at the same time, he's the one who introduced me to you, and so I will never forgive him for that.

I Feel You, Cinderella...

Last night was magical. It really was. Almost 700 people came to see us. You might be saying, "Uh, they came to see Mr. Heyborne, not you!" But he was one of us for the night, and we had a REALLY great time! The set was amazing, the theater was gorgeous, the band was to die for, the audience was a joy, and the talent wasn't too shabby, either. (If I do say so myself...)


I know I say it all the time, but I adore these people and I am so grateful for this outlet in my life. Thanks a thrillion, you guys!


After it was all over, I came home to two major, up-the-back, down-the-leg diaper blow-outs, so don't you worry, I am keeping it REAL.

(Pictured, left to right, are Maclain Nelson, Brett Merritt, some chick in a red shirt, Kirby Heyborne, Jake Suazo, and Matt Mattson. You might be wondering why the poster is backwards in the pics. It's because none of us wanted to stand outside in the 2 degree weather and I don't have the patience or the know-how to flip the thing in Photoshop!)

January Blues Getting You Down?

Have no fear! The Thrillionaires can chase those winter blahs away! On Friday, January 18, the Thrillionaires are kicking off the New Year in their new home at the Stephen R. Covey Arts Center, located in downtown Provo. We have invited Kirby Heyborne to come and be a guest performer for our 1940's themed play and musical. A live jazz quartet, put together by this guy, will accompany us with improvised music. The show begins at 8 and tickets are $10, but contact me for a $3 off coupon that you can use for any event at the Arts Center.

For those of you who have no idea what a Thrillionaire is, we perform live, improvised theater complete with costumes and music. We perform many different styles and genres, including Shakespeare, Western, Film Noir, Rodgers and Hammerstein, Jane Austen, High School Musical, and Sitcom. Don't miss this event!

(I've been meaning to post this for the last few weeks, but somehow my crazy life, a little baby vomit, and a whole lot of nasty diaper business has prevented me from doing so...)

Happy 2008!

Happy New Year, everyone! I have lots to post about, but first up, I'd like to introduce a new blogger. I think she's amazing and her blog can be found here. I'm sure she'd love to hear from you!

(There's bound to be lots of) The Writing on the Wall

(Red eyes were left in photo for dramatic effect)

Give me a T! Give me an E! Give me an A! Give me an M! What does that spell?

One terrified mom.

The girls have known for a little while now that lifting up a toilet seat is hard work and therefore not really worth their time. However, as they discovered this morning, lifting up a toilet seat with four hands is not really hard at all and is, in fact, instantly gratifying. The prospect of them using teamwork horrifies me to no end. You don't understand. My number is up. I'm doomed. Let me explain.

My first two children have never really gotten into stuff. "Whoa, wait a minute," you're saying, "No destroyed make-up, no flour all over the floor, no lotion smeared all over the house?" I am totally serious. For whatever reason, they have pretty much ignored all of the tempting household items surrounding them. I remember once when Mila was not even two, we had a big ol' space heater right in the middle of her room. My sister-in-law, Melanie, was shocked when she saw it and asked, "You don't have to put that away?" all the while eying her own one-year old. But Mila had never even given the thing so much as a second look, let alone touched it.

I was pretty sure that Ethan would change things. I mean, he's a boy, right? But I never even put locks on the cupboards when he was toddling around. No interest whatsoever. Don't get me wrong. There have been trade-offs. We've had relatives tell my kids they don't need to shout when they're standing right in front of them. Repeatedly. They both have quite the flair for the dramatic. But I've never had to clean electric blue lip-gloss out of the carpet or anything. So I've listened to my relatives' stories about Sharpies on leather couches and Desitin all over the mirror with mixed feelings of horror and relief.

I'm sure that you hate me now, but let me get to the point. I am bound to have a troublemaker, sooner or later. The odds just don't add up. But now I'm wishing it had been Ethan, because I just know that it's my turn, and it just so happens that I have TWO. Is that fair? Probably. But that doesn't mean that I can't lie in bed and envision all sorts of schemes that my little team might think up with their two little blond heads. Like climbing out of cribs. Taking off dirty diapers. Opening doors, climbing counters, dumping cold cereal, tearing apart books, eating chalk, cutting hair, breaking priceless family heirlooms, punching holes in walls, beating up smaller, defenseless children, have I forgotten anything? So by all means, feel a little sorry for me. In an earlier post, I said that the best is yet to come. But that was just crazy talk. It's totally the worst. WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?

I AM going to buy leashes. I saw them at Wal-Mart. They're have cute little furry dogs on them or something.

OK, so maybe I'm over-reacting. Maybe they will be complete angels. But when I call you in tears in a few months, I want to be the one who can say, "I told you so!"

Stuff for a Winter's Night

I got out of performing at a doctor's office Christmas pajama party tonight (wha?) and I'm also an LSFWW (Law School Finals Week Widow), so I put my sweatpants on and I have Dove chocolates with caramel and The Carpenters to keep me company. And it's currently snowing. Can you say COZY? Okay, now let's dish about books and movies.


I am almost finished reading Cormac McCarthy's The Road. Oh. My. Why I am so fascinated with post-apocalyptic subject matter I will never know, but I love this book. I just can't stop thinking about it. I also can't stop thinking about how grateful I am for heat and power and running water and the sun! And my healthy, well-fed children. If you read it, you will know what I'm talking about. Then there is the rumored news that Viggo Mortenson will be playing the lead character in the movie version. So great.


Speaking of rumors, supposedly Ryan Gosling was supposed to star in the film version of Alice Sebold's The Lovely Bones, directed by Peter Jackson, but when he showed up for the first day of shooting, he was fired for being overweight! So Mark Wahlberg got the part instead. Cruel Hollywood. I'm pretty sure it's a true rumor, too, because my friend Chris hung out with one Mandy Gosling in New York. Who happens to be Mormon AND an RM, and who also happens to be her brother's manager. (Awesome job, by the way.) I started reading The Lovely Bones recently and I have to admit, I'm hooked. Which is refreshing since I have not been hooked by some other books I have been reading recently. But Mark Wahlberg? Poor Ryan.


Speaking of Ryan, have you seen Lars and the Real Girl yet? It has been my favorite movie of this whole year and maybe last year as well since I don't see many movies. I laughed and I cried, then I laughed until I cried. The acting was A-MA-ZING all around. Emily Mortimer had one monologue that made me cry just because it was that good. Basically, it had everything that I could ever want out of a movie.


A movie with a similar title is Dan in Real Life. This movie was also very good, although I like Lars better. But Steve Carell is awesome, and I like that when I read interviews with him, he is a normal dad guy, not some crazy-ha-ha-in-your-face comedy guy. I like to think that I am that kind of comedian and so I like people like that. He shows up to work, does his job (which happens to be making the funny) then goes home to his family. I would not call the movie a romantic comedy because that would be insulting it. I would prefer to call it a family dramedy, a la The Family Stone.

Remember The Family Stone? And remember that Rachel McAdams was really great in that? She is set to play the lead role in The Time Traveler's Wife, opposite Eric Bana (remember Eric Bana's biceps in Troy?) I hope The Time Traveler's Wife is a good movie because, I have to confess, when I was talking earlier about books that have not had me hooked, this was one of them. It got kind of boring, and the language bugged me. I have issues with language. And they are not Mormony issues. More like childhood scarred-for-life issues. So I stopped reading it. Another book I can't seem to get through is The Amber Spyglass. The Golden Compass was charming enough, and I made my way through The Subtle Knife, but now, with Spyglass, I'm just sort of not into it. And I'm somewhat confused about whose side I'm supposed to be on as a reader, and that annoys me. I'm going to give it another shot, though. I refuse to mention the title of third book that I'm not that into because I'm having sort of an identity crisis about why I can't just be like the rest of the world and root for a lackluster heroine with no hobbies or interests, whose only thoughts are of a gorgeous guy who is manipulative and could potentially harm and/or kill her. But now I've said too much. (Please don't hate me.)


So, um, speaking of The Golden Compass, my mom and I went to see it last week and I liked it. I was expecting not to, because of the horrible reviews, but the girl who played Lyra was perfectly cast, Nicole Kidman was perfectly gorgeous, and I actually understood a couple things more clearly that I didn't fully get while reading the book. And I assume they plan on making the rest of the movies in the trilogy because, if not, that was the lamest excuse for an ending of a movie that I have seen in a LONG time. Other fantasies that I have yet to see? Stardust and Enchanted, both of which look really good.


Other books that I bought at Costco today for myself? The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini, Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marquez, and The Thirteenth Tale by Diane Setterfield. I am looking forward to reading the first two and I already read Tale, but it was my sister's copy and I wanted to have one of my own. It is a must-read if you have ever loved a book by a Bronte sister and/or have twins in your life. I devoured it when I was pregnant with the girls. But I devoured a lot in that time of my life...

Sorry if any of this was hard to follow. Those of you who know me know I have no qualms about talking a lot and changing subjects as quickly as the thoughts enter into my mind, sometimes even before. That's why it's good no one can interrupt me on my blog. I would love to hear your recommendations of other books and movies. Or gossip. Well, this was fun! Maybe next time we (meaning I) can talk about TV! Oh. Now I just remembered the writer's strike and I'm going to go cry myself to sleep.

You'll have to excuse me and my sentimental ramblings, er, journaling...

At this time last year, I was preparing for the end of the world. Armageddon, if you will. The Apocalypse. You see, I had never had twins before and so I had no idea what to expect. I made lists and lists of things that I would need to live off of for the next year, as I would surely not be going grocery shopping ever again. I bought obscene amounts of toilet paper and paper towels and macaroni and cheese. I made sure to get the house decorated for Christmas the second we finished our pumpkin pie because I had so much uncertainty about what my life would become in the near future. I was thinking about my state of mind at that time recently, and I just couldn't think of any other time that I have felt that way. I always have things to do, whether it's things I need to do or should do, but I have never felt such an urgency in my life as I did during that pregnancy.

It was even more surprising when the girls arrived even earlier than I had expected. I went to my scheduled ultrasound the Tuesday after Thanksgiving, and we discovered that there was some twin to twin transfusion occurring. Everybody's reaction went from "Oh, aren't you just the poster child for twin pregnancy?!" to "OK, it looks like these girls need to come out come out ASAP!" I went to my doctor that afternoon and we scheduled my inducement for Thursday. He said he'd prefer to avoid Wednesday because it was his anniversary.

"Sorry about your anniversary..." were my first words to my doctor when I saw him at the hospital the next morning. I had awakened at around 6 am feeling extremely uncomfortable, even on top of my carpal tunnel syndrome and case of the "crazy itchies." I decided to just kind of ignore it and when that didn't work, I got up and decided to take a shower. I came out of the shower saying, "Ben, we should probably get the kids out of bed and get them a very quick breakfast." I was trying to remain calm, while at the same time acknowledging the fact that those spurts of time between contractions were not getting any longer. We dropped off the kids at my amazing neighbor's house, who answered the phone at 7 am like she had been waiting by it for our call.



The rest is just your typical labor and delivery story, except this time I asked for more drugs and I had to deliver in the freezing cold OR with twenty people looking on. The extra drugs were as a result of my delivering Ethan, after the epidural had long worn off, to a nurse, because no doctor was yet present. My anesthesiologist this time around told me after I asked for more of the good stuff, "You're not going to be able to push." To which I replied, "Oh, you better believe I will." I'm sort of a champion pusher. Maybe it's even my special talent. As for my fears of there being no doctor this time? The good thing about having twins is that nobody messes around. The experts bring in "people" who, in turn, bring in their "people." At least that's how it seemed to drugged-up me. Luckily, I was able to deliver them the old-fashioned way, and yes, I probably pushed a total of five times for both. Take that, guy! Lucy was out at 11:49 and three minutes later, after a very red Lane emerged at 11:52, it was all over. (Except for the part where the respiratory specialist started pounding on Laney's chest to get her to breathe, but that turned out OK as well.)





My girls, born four and a half weeks early, were "amazingly healthy" for preemie twins, as everyone in the Level 2 Nursery where they spent their first week commented. Going home from the hospital without my babies was the hardest thing I have ever done in my entire life. However, I have never been so grateful as I was to those nurses who took care of my girls 24 hours a day. I would sit in there and listen to a nurse calling people to get shifts covered, and I realized that if these women (and one man) didn't show up for work, my babies would not live. I owed them the lives of my children, literally. I loved being behind the scenes and seeing how the nurses would joke about certain pediatricians who were "all business" and how they would give so much love and attention to each and every infant in that room. It was a glorious place. Laney got to go home one week after she was born, and little Lucy made it to her benchmark birth weight of 4 lbs. the next day, not wanting to be left behind. The nurse assigned to Lucy on the day she went home even teared up a little as we were getting her ready to go, admitting that she had gotten somewhat attached to her in the past 24 hours.






Once the girls were home, I worried that they were not staying warm enough. They had to try and maintain a temperature of at least 97 degrees. Usually, parents worry about their child being too hot--this was my first experience with it the other way around. Because of the twin to twin transfusion syndrome, and because of their difference in size, it was easy to tell them apart. Lucy was the little white baby, and Lane was the big red one:



I lived in constant fear of illness those first few months. As my doctor lobbied to get my girls the RSV vaccination ("A common cold for your kids means three weeks in the hospital for the babies," she warned me), I strategically placed hand sanitizer all over my house and turned into a germ Nazi. I didn't take them out of the house until March, except for doctor's appointments. Oh yeah, and brief car trips for sustenance.The nights were hard, but most of the time, I truly felt like I had been invited to a party that was going strong 24-7 with no end in sight. It was just such an honor and privilege to be around these amazing, tiny human beings. They were, and still are, awesome little people.





They will be one on Thursday, and so this week is a celebration. Of surviving a year. Of being a part of a world-wide "twin society" and loving every minute of it. Of the unexpected surprise that it has not been as hard as I had feared. Of knowing that the best years are sure to come. Of being able to buy the cutest coordinating clothes and having good cause. Of having the best family and friends that any mom could hope for. Of having two older children who adore their sisters and help out every day. Of only 6 months until Nursery! (I age three years every week at church. By the time they are 18 months, I will be an 80-year old woman...)






Happy Birthday, my angels! Thank you for always keeping the "party" going!

Flyin' SOLO, Take 2

I did it again. I up and left my entire family, the whole kit-n-caboodle, last Friday night for a whirwind trip to Boston. Why, you might ask? To torture my husband? Of course not!! Well...maybe just a little. He is gone A LOT. Just ask our sad un-cleaned-out garage. But that wasn't the main reason.

The main reason was:


OK, so to be fair, there were two other guys involved. We're talking about the Police, people! At this point, some of you are not at all excited about this. My mother-in-law said "Hmm, I've never heard of that group..." Well, you must know that I was raised on the Police. They provided the soundtrack for many a family road trip. I remember, as if it was yesterday, reading Roald Dahl's "George's Marvelous Medicine" to Sting's album The Dream of the Blue Turtles. (Not the Police, but still that same glorious singing voice, etched permanently in my brain) That book and those songs complemented each other very well, in the opinion of my eight-year old self. In junior high, in Chicago, I went to a party and someone got The Police: Greatest Hits CD as a gift. We listened to it and I felt so cool listening to music at a party. I also felt cool for knowing every song on there! And "Every Breath you Take" is still my number one pick for most haunting song EVER.

So back to my weekend. I drove myself to the airport on Friday night after putting all the kids to bed. I was a little nervous because this is the first time I have flown since they have implemented all of the liquid restrictions. I anxiously re-examined my one-quart bag with all of my precious less-than-3-oz. toiletries. I scoffed at someone in the line holding a gallon-size ziploc bag. Well, so maybe scoffing isn't my thing, but I got really worried for them. Luckily, getting through security at 10:30 pm is not all that bad, although I was surprised when they asked me to remove my cardigan sweater. I was wearing a turtleneck underneath, but what if it had been a tank top? I was horrified at the thought. (I'm sure many of you can imagine why...) What would they do to me if I said no? I tried not to think about it too much as I went to the gate.

My stay in Boston was brief, but memorable. I got to see the play my mom had directed about Robin Hood, I got to meet my brother's girlfriend, Meg, who is super-cool and super-smart. I also saw my awesome friend from BYU, Christina Davis. We graduated in Acting together and I miss her!

We made time for this special place:


This store rocks. You need to go there if you are ever in a city where there is one. And I got the cutest pink and brown plaid dress coats for the girls that you have ever seen! I am actually glad that I don't live near one because it would destroy me financially.

Brinna, Aydan and I made time to take ridiculous pictures of ourselves:





Isn't Brinna beautiful? (BTW, I'm going to start calling my blog a brag, and instead of blogging, I will be bragging, because that's what it is in this post, let's be honest...Although I was sure to put some not so lovely pics of us as well--look at Brinny in the background of Aydan's pic--ha!)

We ate dinner at Red Bones, where Clayton and Meg both work (Meg is the lovely brunette girl on Clayton's right):







See? Not pretty, but I love dining pictures, because that is where I am in my element! Bring on the food!

And of course, the concert! For another account of the concert, read my mom's account here. We were bummed because we didn't bring our cameras but they didn't even check and we were in the 10th row! (On the side, but still!) So I took this pic with my camera phone. My mom is looking up at Sting on the monitor above us, or rather looking at his biceps, which were not small. (I am so not attracted to him...)



For those who want to know, here is the setlist:

Message in a Bottle
Synchronicity II
Walking On The Moon
Voices Inside My Head
When The World Is Running Down
Don't Stand So Close To Me
Driven To Tears
Truth Hits Everybody
Hole In My Life
Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic
Wrapped Around Your Finger
De Do Do Do De Da Da Da
Invisible Sun
Walking In Your Footsteps
Can't Stand Losing You
King Of Pain
So Lonely
Every Breath You Take
Next To You

I know what you're thinking. No Roxanne? It WAS strange, considering every time that I've gone to see Sting solo, HE sings it. Here is one of many videos I took with my phone, but I only had 15 seconds a pop, and so this is my favorite:



In conclusion, this trip would not have been remotely possible without the help of Clayton, Ben, Heather, and Lisa. Clayton bought my mom the tickets. He is my hero. Heather is my friend Jenny's sister and she watched the kids so Ben could go to the library. Lisa talked me into going after I had decided it was silly, and I didn't feel TOO bad about her volunteering to watch three of my kids for one morning because she had a concert experience of her own that very weekend. Read about it here. It's a good one! Ben is a trooper as well. Lucy threw up numerous times on Saturday night and I felt horrible! I abandoned my children, and so they got sick. But don't worry, I got major payback after I arrived home. Within ONE hour of my return, Ethan threw up all over his bed. And eight times after that. Then when he finished, Mila started. Nothing like jumping back into the trenches to make you feel at home!

Finally, this is for you, Mom:


Thanks for a great weekend!